Lili Trifilio on Self-Discovery, Beach Bunny’s Forthcoming Album, and Life’s Silver Linings
As frontwoman of the meteoric Beach Bunny, Lili Trifilio is your mirror. Initially beginning her career as a solo artist in Chicago, Trifilio formed Beach Bunny in 2017, just one year before their candid breakout track “Prom Queen” was released. What followed was a whirlwind of critical acclaim and adulation from millions of women around the world who found solace in her deeply personal lyrics about self-discovery and self-love.
Beach Bunny’s latest single, “Big Pink Bubble,” explores the crippling weight of people-pleasing, providing the perfect backdrop to their forthcoming album, Tunnel Vision.
Our publisher, Kristin Prim, spoke to Lili about her path of self-discovery, Beach Bunny’s newest release, and how she continues to find life’s silver linings.
KP: Beach Bunny exploded back in 2019, with “Prom Queen” reaching a particularly high level of virality online. The song itself very unequivocally explores the subjects of body issues and self-confidence. What in particular led to that track being written, and what was it like to see so many women around the globe relate to it on such an intrinsic level?
LF: I wrote “Prom Queen” for a friend who was struggling with an eating disorder at the time, something I had also struggled with for several years prior. I figured if I couldn’t get through to her through words, music might be able to communicate a path to getting help. It was absolutely surreal knowing that so many people connected to the lyrics on a personal level. In a beauty-forward world, recognizing the degree of harmful social conditioning that we experience surrounding image seems important to talk about. I’m so happy that I could contribute to the conversation.
KP: I’m happy that you could, too. You say that you wrote “Cloud 9” in essence to save your relationship, but I’m sure it’s been interesting to watch it become such a canon song for people wholesomely expressing their “baggage-less” love, as you put it (guilty! It’s on my playlist to my girlfriend!). [Laughs].
But surely this just speaks to the transmutability of art and how the same piece of creative work can mean so many different things to so many different people. What is your relationship to that song like now? Did it serve its purpose for you in your personal life? Do you often write for catharsis?
LT: The track was more so a song I wrote at the end of my relationship, not necessarily with any intention of saving anything. I saw the end was near and was mourning the love that we once had. Now when I think of the track, I hardly remember its original intention – I mostly associate the song with having fun at shows and rocking out. We’ve had a couple of people propose during it, which is one of my favorite concert memories – it makes the track all the more special.
KP: Speaking of “Cloud 9,” you got to collaborate with Tegan and Sara on a re-release of the track, which must have been so cool. The Con still has me in quite the chokehold, as I know it does for so many people around our age. What was that experience like?
LT: Tegan and Sara are such talented, funny, and wonderful people. I was quite shocked that they wanted to hop on the remix, but I can’t think of a better collaboration, especially for making an inclusive version of the song.
KP: I love them. Are there any other artists that you’d love to collaborate with?
LT: I would love to collaborate with more girlies. Hemlocke Springs or Dora Jar come to mind immediately.
KP: On “Weeds” off of 2022’s Emotional Creature, you say, “You can’t blossom if you keep growing gardens out of weeds,” a concept that I think all of us can deeply relate to. How do you try to find the silver linings in life despite personal struggles?
LT: I think happiness isn’t a state you can stay in forever, so when it slips, I try to turn to meditation, prayer, leaning on my loved ones, and staying active. A long walk can be remarkably healing, and it usually gives me a lot of clarity. The book The Untethered Soul by Michael Signer has helped me understand who I am under all of these layers of emotions. I think that surviving difficulties makes you realize how much you can handle and still be okay.
“I think that surviving difficulties makes you realize how much you can handle and still be okay.”
KP: The same track also discusses issues with self-worth and only finding value in yourself in the presence of someone else (“Begging a boy to come for help when I could just learn to love myself / Cause he’s not the problem / The problem is you think you’re only viable for love / When someone makes you feel complete.”)
That was something that I struggled with so often when I was younger – I could have had everything and all the success in the world, but if I wasn’t in a relationship, everything meant nothing to me. I think that came from my own sense of wanting something so wholesome with someone – this great love that I had never experienced – and it took so many years for me to unlearn that, to find joy and value in things outside of romantic love.
What are some ways that you have learned to love yourself in the absence of someone else?
LT: I think one day something clicked, and I realized that I was wasting so much time in toxic patterns with other people – time that I could have spent growing my dreams, platonic relationships, and enjoying my life. I sabotaged my own happiness by putting my entire self-worth into the hands of another person when I actually didn’t mind being me or hanging out with myself. I think the biggest lesson I learned was the importance of having my interests, friends, and goals inside and outside of a relationship.
KP: Same! When you’re finally okay with being alone, it makes a relationship feel that much more special anyway, being something that you want and not something that you need.
You initially started Beach Bunny as a solo project in 2015 after years of delay due to the intimidating nature of the music industry. What helped you get over that hesitation to finally record Animalism?
LT: Beach Bunny came to fruition as I was entering college – truthfully it didn’t have anything to do with intimidation of the industry – it was more about age and resources. High school can be really grueling, and I loved to sing covers in my free time, but I never considered writing my own music. However, in college, being surrounded by so many creative and encouraging peers, I gave it a real effort and loved the entire process. l owe a lot to the DePaul music community and the Chicago local scene in general.
KP: Your latest single, “Big Pink Bubble,” releases today. Can you tell us a little about its inspiration and production?
LT: “Big Pink Bubble” was one of the last tracks added to the record. It was inspired by my internal battle with people-pleasing tendencies and making myself small to make others more comfortable. It’s still something that I struggle with, but I think acknowledging those bad habits is the first step to fixing them.
KP: It absolutely is. “Vertigo,” the first single off your forthcoming album, Tunnel Vision, was released last year, exploring themes such as self-sabotage and imposter syndrome. I think overcoming much of that is a lifelong journey, but can you lend any advice to women who are currently dealing with self-destructive thought patterns or habits? What has helped you?
LT: It’s cliché, but the best thing that you can do for yourself is not compare yourself to other people. Everyone’s on their own journey, and not everything that you see on social media is real. There have been periods where I’ve had to take social media breaks because it was affecting my mental health – that’s been super helpful. Ideally, I wouldn’t be online at all, but it kind of comes with the job of being an artist.
KP: Speaking of Tunnel Vision, it comes out next month! What can we expect from it?
LT: You can expect some rockin' existential hits. My goal with writing the album was to explore the relationship I have with myself and with the world as a person in her mid-late 20s. I hope that people relate to it in the end.
KP: What do you feel makes a provocative woman?
LT: I think that being true to yourself will always make you shine.
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Photography: Alec Basse
